I’m amazed and saddened at how popular my blogs about toxic work environments are.  I’m glad to be of service, but sad to realize how prolific dysfunction is in the work place, and how impactful that can be when it’s taken home.  On the brighter side, I’ve noticed that it’s that negative impact on one’s home life that usually sparks a motivation for change.

It was that way for me.  My wife and I work on our marriage and parenting skills constantly, and the toxicity of my work environment showed up a marriage counseling session.  I realized the damage it was doing to me as well as to my family, so I put my foot down and said, “No more.”

I turned things around because I knew that it takes two to tango.   When I was no longer willing to play the game, the game stopped.  I was very specific about the way I wanted to be treated, and what I wasn’t willing to stand for anymore.  I did this from a position of strength.  That strength came from my stated willingness to walk away if it didn’t stop.

I do intermittent work for a company, and I still find myself saying, “No thank you,” to dance requests on a regular basis.  I have also become the shoulder to lean on in times of discontent among the people on the sales force.  I remind them that they are working in a broken system and if they want to stay, the only solution is to make peace with it.  They cannot change the system itself; they can only find their peace within it.

So if you find yourself in one of these broken systems and can’t leave, my advice to you is, don’t play the game.  Dig your heels in and find your peace.  If that doesn’t work, endure it until you find something else.  Life is too short to hate what you do for a living, especially if you’re bringing that negativity and toxicity home.